Wednesday, December 19, 2007

helping a loved one find recovery from a drug or alcohol addiction ...part 1 of 3

having a close friend or family member who is an addict can be very traumatizing. they can be hard to understand many times and also seem untrustworthy. the person they are deep inside is the one you dearly love. and that person is still there, you just gotta have patience and persistence. trust me, it will pay off. do not try to force an addict into recovery because that approach will never work. no "in your face" approaches nor try to jam religion down an addicts throat. it will never work. always be gentle, compassionate, caring, concerned and a good listener. you will need to build a trust with your loved one and hold no bias in dealing with them. they might begin to tell you things that may shock you, just love them and do not judge them. do not bring up times in the past when they have disappointed or even stolen from you. their need to feed their addiction is the reason for the disappointing acts they have committed in the past. you want the addict to get well and move on with their life, so you must talk with them only in those terms. do not overwhelm them with future events, think and talk only in the now. they will have days filled with ups and downs, there will be hours where they need to use and don't want you around, and there will be hours where they are thinking heavily about seeking help and quitting their addiction. that's where they need to know that you will be there. their mind will swing like a pendulum so be ready. when they are down and out and talk of quitting, you must strike while the iron is hot. if you do not know anything about what to do when they reach out for help, then prepare for that moment by going out and finding someone to help you when the time is right. you can either go to an al anon meeting and ask there for someone who can talk to your loved one when they are ready, or you can go see a counselor who will advise you how to contact them when your addicted loved one reaches out for help. after you find someone to intervene when that time comes, casually let the addict know that you care, and that you have been talking to someone "nice" who would be glad to assist in a recovery plan. it's important that the person who you both go to see has experience with being sober and acts in a friendly will really help greatly if you can bring them to go see an ex addict who truly understands. they will form a bond with the addict immediately. in order for the addict to quit using, they need to change their environments where there are no recognizable triggers that can cause them to use again. bring them into a new area of town that they are unfamiliar with . they will be uneasy and jittery when they first quit using, so you need to prepare to keep them calm in some way. if they have been a heavy user then you should be prepared to get them to inpatient detox right away. there they will be under medically supervised care. if you cannot afford detox then please contact your state human services department and they will provide state sponsored detox for free. before your addicted loved one finds recovery, you will need to begin talking with them about detox so you can prepare and set it up quickly when they decide they will accept help. in detox they are usually administered sedatives so that they can sleep and relax as their body withdraws from the chemicals that have become so necessary for them to survive. the bodies cells need to readapt to normal and this process is a shock to their system. the first 5 days or so will be the most traumatic on them. but detox in a proper setting will make this process as safe as possible.

there will be 3 parts to this condensed "how to help a loved one find recovery" blog.

my alcohol and drug addiction blogs that you find here are in conjunction with my website and book entitled "A NEW JOURNEY" RECOVERY FROM ALCOHOL AND DRUG ADDICTION.


i will always be sharing more with you ....

thanks, and god bless you. john carcerano

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